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Title  A Family Affair
Author  Kalyth Dragonchild
Submitted / Updated  01-24-2006 / 01-30-2006
Category  Old BioWare Contest
Expansions  Works on all versions
Setting  The Capital city of Arwyll
Language  English
Races  Any
Tricks & Traps  Light
Roleplay  Medium
Hack & Slash  Medium
Classes  Wizards and sorcerers have more in-depth choices.
Scope  Medium
DMNeeded  No DM Required
Single or Multiplayer  Single Player
Max Character Level  20
Max # Players  Any
Min # Players  01
Min Character Level  08
Content Rating  Everyone
Alignments  Any
Gameplay Hours  03
Galannor, a bard of the town of Arwyll, needs you to save his brother Ibnothep, a magician who’s been kept by the order of the Wandbreakers. He needs you to also retrieve the shards of a powerful relic in order to establish back order in his hometown.
But what if the one he must face is someone he loves?


Submitted: 01-24-2006 / Last Updated: 01-24-2006
15 votes
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Comments (43):

  1  2 Next>

Posted by Boozehound Blue at 2006-03-20 13:23:35    Voted 10.00
Not a strong story. Not strong characters. Never got into the nitty gritty of this family affair. Multiple grammatical errors, ex. “sweared”. (6.5)

Posted by Redbeard_219 at 2006-03-13 19:23:04    Voted 7.00 on 03/13/06
The solutions were too easy. It seemed too easy to persuede from a fanatic to cooperation.
Modules rated: 65
Average: 5.92
Standard Dev: 1.48

Posted by Kalyth ( ) at 2006-03-02 18:30:06    
@thegeorge: there has been a misunderstanding: I thought my 3 NPCs had to be placed in a 4x4 area, but weren't meant to be "really" so near. In fact the three chars in my mod should be: galannor in the streets of the town, the Staffbreaker in her office inside the fortress and Ibnothep in a prison cell...
It's not I haven't taken the contest seriously, I misunderstood the requests...*weeps and cries*

Posted by Kenrae at 2006-02-28 12:13:05    Voted 3.00 on 02/28/06
I didn't like it at all. The writing was nothing special, but the plot and the "characters" were dull.

Posted by thegeorge at 2006-02-25 10:19:41    Voted 2.50 on 02/25/06
Indeed the bizarre list of commentless praise in the comments section is highly suspicious, but no matter because I'm sure the combat is a disqualification. It is unfortunate that you didn't take the contest seriously.

Posted by Aelin at 2006-02-24 14:17:42    
Expansions needed!

Certo che siete davvero in tanti a dire che il vostro modulo funziona per tutte le versioni ma poi richiede le espansioni.

Why all your better rating are in comment and not as vote? It's strange.

Posted by charonalpha at 2006-02-23 21:04:23    
Interesting to see how a lot of the "Ratings" are given on the same day within minutes of each other... Gee, trying to stack the score much?

Posted by MikeLM9215 at 2006-02-22 20:38:32    Voted 6.00 on 02/22/06
An exercise in linearity.

The road to Ravenloft is paved with good intentions.

Posted by RobFaeth at 2006-02-15 21:31:25    Voted 3.75 on 02/15/06
Heh. Love how you have all the ratings without getting . . . well, you know . . . ratings.

Posted by RobFaeth at 2006-02-15 21:28:44    Voted 3.75 on 02/15/06
Well, that was . . . brief. I played through in about three minutes. Just to verify what was going on, I pulled this thing up in the toolset. You went 700 words under the limit, which would be fine if you'd truly told a story. As it is, you had 1700 words to explain the situation (which you did pretty well, though obviously it wasn't important enough for 1700 words. You did, however, give too many options, I felt, and dragged things out quite a bit), then 1100 words to do a quest which was pretty much the easiest thing in the world.


Here's pretty much how I beat this. "Hi, can I have your amulet shard?" "Yeah, okay." "Hey, you too. I want your shard." "Yeah, okay." "I got the shards." "Great."


It really should be a little more complicated than that.

The writing itself was about on average with a lot of what's in the competition, which means it could use some work. You need to improve grammar and spelling as have already been mentioned.

Also, you had a lot of options in the beginning, considering you had practically NONE by the end. The only options were no good, as none really fit my character. It always seemed either "very good" or "very bad." I want a middleground, for God's sake! Can it really be that difficult?

If this review sounds harsh, just be aware, I'm having a small fight with my girlfriend (who got mad at me for telling her it was okay if she went to bed! This girl confuses me so much . . . .), and I'm taking it out on you! Bwa-ha-ha . . . ha . . . ha. Well, I suppose I shouldn't give you a one, then, if I've told you why. Fine, I'll give an honest rating.

Well, there you go then. This thing needs some desperate fleshing out, and the story needs to be more enticing. There should be more good dialogue options later, and you need to trim and pollish (especially looking for grammar and spelling). If all that were done, this would be a pretty decent module. So, there you have it. Have fun!

Posted by Dnl_Jms_Frwrd at 2006-02-15 17:04:39    Voted 4.00 on 02/15/06
I managed to make the woman attack me by explaining to her that I’d use force if necessary. After I’d dispatched her the other two turned on me as well, so they also died. All of this was against the contest rules. Then I reloaded and played through again and pretty much found the same problems as twh7.

Posted by pierre147 ( ) at 2006-02-11 04:12:43    
absolutely great..10/10!!!!

Posted by keigo ( ) at 2006-02-10 14:33:03    

Posted by Baltazar ( ) at 2006-02-10 12:45:25    
Very Very VERY GOOD!!

Great Job

Posted by MAURO ( ) at 2006-02-10 04:29:02    
Very good!

Posted by The_Krit at 2006-02-08 00:55:28    Voted 2.50 on 02/08/06
The point of this contest is judging your ability to write in English, so I won't give special consideration for non-native speakers. Sorry. And there are a number of spelling and grammatical mistakes.

Furthermore, you violated one of the rules of the competition: "No combat or special skill use." You had both. You may have converted persuade checks to charisma checks, but it amounts to the same thing: a judge cannot view all the dialog options in-game. To make matters worse, when you introduced combat, you broke the module. (If one NPC attacks you, then all the NPC's are hostile.)

As for the writing itself, the dialog is simplistic, and offers very few choices. It is also incomplete. An example: when trying to free Ibnothep, there is no option covering a character with strength under 20 and insufficient lockpicking skills. Also, if you choose the "'your' town" and "I mean, he's a wizard!" options in Galannor's opening dialog, you get the quest after hearing nothing about the lack of magic, nor about the shards. The result is a bit confusing.

Don't take my rating too harshly. It is influenced by the intent of the contest.

Posted by hripsimé ( ) at 2006-02-07 14:23:02    
An intense situation and well characterized NPCs...hope to see it completely developed!

Posted by hripsimé ( ) at 2006-02-07 14:22:58    
An intense situation and well characterized NPCs...hope to see it completely developed!

Posted by hripsimé ( ) at 2006-02-07 14:22:53    
An intense situation and well characterized NPCs...hope to see it completely developed!

Posted by ryujimihira ( ) at 2006-02-07 07:28:58    
nice work Kalith


Posted by Dannato ( ) at 2006-02-07 06:11:16    
well done kalyth, grat work.

score: 10/10

Posted by cormac ( ) at 2006-02-07 06:07:04    
very interesting.
score: 10

Posted by Dora85 ( ) at 2006-02-07 01:15:57    
Great! 10!

Posted by The Fool On The Hill ( ) at 2006-02-07 00:12:54    
Score: 10/10

It's a crazy situation
But all I need are NWN & Kalyth Dragonchild's Module

Posted by Veldrane Manytrick ( ) at 2006-02-06 13:33:42    

Posted by Ariok ( ) at 2006-02-06 10:59:20    

Posted by giorgio ( ) at 2006-02-06 10:08:20    
very nice - 10

Posted by Fede ( ) at 2006-02-06 09:20:37    
Great plot! 10!!

Posted by Garret ( ) at 2006-02-06 09:10:55    

Posted by Orannor ( ) at 2006-02-06 09:08:12    
I like the dialogs and the plot development. I think that in future it can be enlarged without much effort; a well done adventure!

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